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Archive for the ‘Homekeeping’ Category

I can’t quit talking about it. It’s on the brain.

Yesterday, I talked about the glory of spring, the beauty of spring, and singing really high and twirling around and around on a really high mountain somewhere in Europe. Don’t ask me where I get these strange impulses. I have no idea.

Going on.

One thing I DON’T love about spring is this grand, glorious expectation called (drumroll, please) Spring Cleaning. Yeah. Doesn’t that just sound so huge? Too huge. It always makes me freeze and wonder how I’m going to get “it” all done. (I still have as yet to figure out what “it” is, but that is another subject altogether.) The only thing I can think is:

I_don’t_know_where_to_start.

And that little, rebellious part of me that I try not to indulge very often wants to say, “Who says I have to do it now?” And then the other too-little trying-to-be-wise-and-grown-up part says, “Ok. Probably is a good idea.” But the issue still needs an answer.

I_still_don’t_know_where_to_start.

I look around and wonder, If I do the windows will they last long enough to be considered clean enough to count as Spring Cleaning-worthy? What about the blinds? Do I have to submerge them in the bathtub and scrub them with a scrub brush, or can I surreptitiously blow off the dust and still be considered a responsible adult? These are big questions, ladies. Tell me, what IS Spring Cleaning. Is it like Father Time and Jack Frost? Is it something that comes upon us that just happens? If so, I’m living in some sort of alternate reality or time-warp.

Honestly, I wish it was like in ‘Finding Nemo’ when all the little, cute, ocean creatures that are being kept in that fish tank are trying to set themselves free and so they sabotage their tank’s cleaning system. And then, without them knowing, the doesn’t-know-he’s-evil, evil dentist changes the filter overnight. In the morning, the little, sing-y starfish Peach says, “Good morning. It’s morning, everyone! Today’s the day! The sun is shining, the tank is clean, and we are getting out of….*gasp*…the tank is cleanTHE TANK IS CLEAN!” And then one of the other fish asks in a ragged voice, “How?”

The answer in this case was a completely self-cleaning Aqua Scum 2003.

Why, oh why haven’t they come up with something like that for humans? They could call it the House Dump 2008. Just hang it in one of your windows, go to sleep, and wake up the next day with Peaches’ wonderment.

“Good morning! Today’s the day! The sun is shining, the house is clean….*gasp*…THE HOUSE IS CLEAN!

Lovely, lovely thought, isn’t it?

Now that I’ve wasted time fantasizing about what can never, never happen, I’ll go do some dishes, a few loads of laundry, and mop a sticky floor. Maybe the Spring Cleaning Bug will firmly bite me this year and I can provide that same star-fish wonderment for my little family come morning.

So I guess there IS a ‘House Dump 2008’. That would be me.

I will try to wear the badge proudly.

So, to all the 2008’s out there, stay strong and ‘Happy Spring Cleaning’!

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